Oh, HELL No

The Maternal Girl must have paid Netscape a few bucks to create an all-Madonna channel in Radio@Netscape to promote her new album, American Life. Being an erstwhile Madonna fan, I decided to check it out. For every "Burning Up" or "Cherish," there are thre or four tracks from the new one. And boy, does it stink. I'd heard about "American Life," and was able to do some second-hand mocking, but having actually heard the song, it's almost too much. I just can't find the words to express how bad the song is. And the rapping! Madonna! Stop! You want Lourdes and Rocco to respect your work? Stop making records. At least stop writing the lyrics and letting third-rate djs mix them.

The rapping: "I've got a manager, three nannies and a private jet..." What the hell? Is it all about the Benjamins all of the sudden? The whole song is about where she is in "this American Life." I've got news for you Madonna, I don't care how hard you worked to get where you are and how much bling bling you've got on the baby's stroller. Anyone who has owned a TV in the last fifteen years already knows. You've told us over and over about your freaking hard knock life. Breaking News! Did you hear that Madonna's mother, who was also named Madonna, died when Madonna was just a child? Did you know that Madonna sucked off djs to have her records played at Danceteria? Yes? Of course you did, because everyone knows.

"I'd like to express my extreme point of view, I'm not a Christian, I'm not a Jew..." That's extreme, Madonna. Extremely STUPID. And what's with the repetition of "Unh... Fuck it!" Yes, very scholarly. Quite the commentary on American life. Bravo, Mrs. Ritchie.

>urp<

Sorry, I had to throw up a little bit. In conclusion, all post-Bedtime Stories Madonna might as well be trash bin material. That's my extreme point of view.