Close Encounter

I almost forgot, I had a real New York moment Saturday night. As I was leaving Marie's Crisis around 4 am, a girl who was also leaving asked me if I wanted to see something funny. "Sure!" I said, opening my umbrella. The rain was driving and very cold. As I followed her around the corner she asked, "Are you hungry?" then whipped off her coat and pulled down her shirt at the neckline so her breasts were exposed. She stalked up to the service window at Karavas screaming, "Pizzzzzaaaaaaa! Piiiiiiiiizzzzaaaaaaaa! Piiizzzzaaaaaaa? PIIIIIIIZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAA!" The window was crowded with people who were in shock. The counter guys just laughed and went to get her a slice. "I do this every night," she said. "You know that show 'Real Sex' on HBO?" she asked, as she wrote something across her chest with pink lipstick. "I was on that." Then she smeared lipstick over her lips and kissed the window. I told the counter guys I would also like a slice, but I wouldn't be getting naked, so I was happy to pay. "No, you get a free one, too, you're with her." The Downtown 1/9 was closed at Christopher, so we walked to 14th Street and she told me about her checkered past at Marie's, the book she'd written, Heather Matarazzo stomping her feet and singing "The Man Who Got Away," and her aborted relationship with the guy who says "Stand clear of the closing doors," on the 2 train. I felt simultaneously boring as hell, and thankfully well adjusted. Thank you, New York, for coming through every once in a while.