Open Letter To The TV People

Dear TV People,

OK, we all appreciate your efforts to pander to liberals and homosexuals and the easily titillated mainstream by bringing us such fare as Boy Meets Boy, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, It's All Relative, and older shows like Will & Grace, Normal, Ohio, Six Feet Under, and Oz. But enough with the fags, already. Where are the lesbians? Hmm? Sure, you tossed us Ellen, the Sapphic moms on Friends, and the precious relationship turned ham-handed character assassination that was Willow on Buffy, but I think we could do more to give the girls some equal time.

What? You say that you're simply developing television shows that happen to have gays in them? That the increase in the number of sympathetic homosexual male characters is art imitating life? OK, then bring on the dykes. Maybe they don't make as good television as the same old tired jokes about interior decorating and disco music, but I'm sure that a little lipstick lesbian action would boost your young male viewership. Look at the success All My Children has had with making Erica Kane's youngest daughter a gorgeous girl-kisser, dating a dark and mysterious foreign bisexual! That's good TV, people!

So, please, add more lesbians to the TV lineup. It's only fair.

Sincerely,

An Annoyed Viewer